The Power of Good Buy

This is the £6 million pad Madge and Guy, sorry, Madge, bought in Marylebone, London. I've been past and it's all very innocuous. Not very showbiz at all. A bit of a let down really. If Dame Shirley Bassey* lived there she'd have a great big, fuck off 'DSB' in lights above the door and a silk-gloved arm, rattling with Asprey & Garrard's finest gems, would do a Bassey flourish from the bedroom window on a regular basis.

Apparently Jennifer Saunders was in on the original bidding process. She stopped at £3.57. But our Madge won over Mario Testino and added it like a Monopoly house to her bulging property portfolio.

I thought this letter in the free evening paper, London Lite, summed up what everyone must be thinking about this story:

"Madonna can shell out £6m on another London home, but what about plans for Malawi, from where she adopted David? It seems to have gone quiet - they could do with that sort of cash. Gem - London"

*shakes head and looks to the floor*

Her Madge and Daby Bavid**


*Dame Shirley Bassey walking to the stage in Glastonbury, where apparently, she went down a storm, despite the storms. Show us your wellies, love!

**In the UK sitcom, The Royal Family, Gran, said to Denise's baby David, after a few too many: "Night, night Daby Bavid" to much hilarity across the nation.