Tit (bits)

"D'YOU LIKE THAT, ABI?"
UK readers will know the above as an oft-heard phrase in the John Leslie household, either while being shagged senseless or snorting a line. Either way, you could legitimately level it at Ms. Titmus as she is given the boot on Deadline tonight. And quite rightly so. There's only so far you can go with fluttering eyelashes and simpering smiles and NO work.
True story:
Abi: Oh gawd. I was in the Daily Star, the Mirror AND The Sun today! All they want are pictures of me and all I want is something to eat. I'm starving. Where can I go tonight where I won't get papped?
Me: Home?
Abi: Erm? What?
Me: OK. There's a kebab shop in Hackney...
*she walks away*

SIMON COWELL HAS A FEW BOB.
Word reaches us via every media source that Simon Cowell can now officially afford to buy a better life for hundreds of thousands of families. His earnings have topped £100 million ($200,287,388.39). But, like the selfish bastard he is, he's keeping it all to himself and even having a laugh at Robbie 'Pov' Williams along the way. Tsk. *Rolls eyes heavenwards*

ALL BETS OFF FOR SUMMER NUMBER ONE
This is going to be number one for AGES. This mix sounds like Lou Pearlman has a new set of bumboys to rent out, but no! This is a band doing 'nice remix, shame about the band' (Cornershop, anyone?) and scoring a big fat commercial pop hit. AWFUL name though. Hellogoodbye? Hello?
Here In Your Arms - Hellogoodbye (mp3)

And finally, Lisa I'Anson...
Here's a face for radio.
Well, it would be if she didn't keep getting sacked!